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Have you ever lost sense of who you are in a relationship?



Well, that happened to me in my first relationship. I was in a relationship for nine years. And for the first two years it was great, because everything was new. We were getting to know each other.

But on the second year I realized, "Oh my gosh, we don't even want the same things in life, in terms of our ultimate goals." I wanted big, I wanted grand, I wanted freedom. I wanted success on the biggest levels. He wanted success too, but not on that grand level. He liked to be small. He liked to stay small. That's where his comfort is.

There's nothing wrong with that. What was wrong was that I couldn't leave because I was scared shit about being alone. And I ended up staying for seven more years after, becoming very abusive. I was so unhappy because I knew myself that I was keeping myself in a prison. So of course I'm not happy. I was looking at everybody else to make me happy. I was looking at him to make me happy. I was looking at my friends to make me happy, but no one was able to make me happy because the person that needed to do what I wanted to do would not allow myself, because I was so scared to be alone.

The ninth year he decided to walk away from me because I had cheated on him three times, he took me back three times. Obviously if I would have tried to get back again, in my heart of all hearts at that point, I knew that I was going to do it again. And for the first time in my life, guys, I learned love. I learned love because I actually let him go. I knew that he was too good of a person to undergo another part of my abuse all over again. I actually released him and I let him go.

That was the first moment I started my own life. And it was scary, it was dark. I was untethered. I wasn't connected to anything. I wasn't dependent on anything because I had nothing to hold on to. What I did was I just picked up my bags, had $1,000 in my pocket, and I went off to Hong Kong to find myself. It was probably the scariest moment of my life, but yet the most freeing. It's the weirdest feeling. But it really, for the next 25 years after that, today I have everything that I've ever wanted. And it wasn't an easy path.

I've really studied self-mastery. I've pushed myself to limits just to understand what goes on in our heart verses in our mind. I got successful, but one thing I never ever let go of was love. That's all I've ever wanted. And so I went out there and I got to know myself. Today I work with women all around the world, finding themselves, owning themselves, and unapologetically living what your heart desires and to let go of what doesn't serve you. It's not easy. I'm not saying it's easy, but when you have the right support and the formula to do it, it becomes with ease.

I want to show you all exactly how to get there faster than I did. Because 25 years it took me to really nail that formula, but it didn't take me 25 years to learn it. It took me a good 10 to 15 years to learn it, but I want to shorten that time for you. So make a decision, hold onto that beautiful life that you want, anything your heart desires. 

I will show you how to let go of the things that are scary. And we'll do this together, because you know what? Nothing is better than being heard and to have that sense of belonging. And it starts with yourself and loving yourself and owning who you are. We will both define who you are according to what your heart wants. All right? And I look forward to working with you.

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©2020 by Susan Hum